To Chris...

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I think someone misses you....

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Alexa Update

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We all have a story. It belongs to only us and no one else. This is a new chapter in Alexa's story. A chapter that I did not wish for her but one that I know in time, will touch someone and make a difference in their life. This.has.been.hard. Let me catch you up. This is Alexa's Boston Brace. This is her being fitted for the brace. Not sure how I feel about this brace quite yet. Right now, Alexa hates it. And...I hate it for Alexa. She is struggling and it takes everything in me to try and stay positive for her. But I will do anything to push her because I know deep down she is one of the toughest girls out there. There are 3 stages: Stage 1: Alexa is required to wear the brace for 6 hours per day for two weeks. We are to take it off every 2 hours to check for any sores of rubbing on her skin. Right now, we are trying to fit the hours in at home as Alexa is not ready to wear it to school or even out of the house at all. Stage 2: Alexa will be requi...
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Alexa Anne

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Who is Alexa? If you know her, you know she can either be very shy or really silly. You don't know what you're going to get but it's always great. She writes the most encouraging notes just when you need them and her hugs, when I get them, are pretty damn amazing. Alexa has always been a Daddy's girl no doubt. I knew deep down that one day she would need me. Of course she would always need me in some way because let's face it, the girl is a picky eater and if I didn't make her lunch she might starve. See? She needs me! But on a deeper level, Alexa and I have always struggled to really see eye to eye. We butt heads when Chris travels and it's been a mystery to me what it is exactly that she needs from me as her mom. I just always felt in my heart that one day she would really NEED me. She recently got a gift card and she spent it on a pair of Christmas Pajamas. She begged her dad to get me the exact same pajamas so that she and I could match. I am no...
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It's rough

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It's rough when you're a fixer. When you hear of a problem or an issue that causes someone discomfort or pain or frustration or anger. I tend to try to fix it. I can't fix Alexa. Things right now are a roller coaster as she's trying to navigate who she is and how she feels. Right now it's moment by moment and that's been tough. I can't fix how she is feeling and I can't fix her back to be normal and I can't fix the length of time she's in her brace and I can't fix that she feels insecure in everything she wears because she's afraid people will see her brace and I can't fix that it's uncomfortable and I can't fix that she's angry and I can't fix that she cares how people view her and I can't fix that sometimes hugs aren't wanted. To be at an age where you are coming into your own and figuring out who you are, Alexa is feeling defined by her Scoliosis. She has her moments of strength and for that I ...
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