HELP!!!!

Alright. I am at the end of my rope. Each night, my head hits the pillow between 10:00 and 11:00 p.m. Oh the feeling of knowing the day has come to an end, my eyes will not stay open. The cool sheets wrap themselves around me, I kiss Chris goodnight, say my prayers, and just as I drift off........"mommy, I need you".
"LANDON...it is bedtime get back in your bed!"
The last three/four months, this is how my nights have been each and everynight. Not to mention the almost hour that it took to get him to stay in bed at his actual bedtime that we have to at least start by 7:00 p.m. because it just might take an entire hour to get him to sleep. Let me just list to you everything we have tried.
(and when I say "tried" i don't mean we tried it once or twice, this is over a two weeks span or more)
We have tried a routine, dinner, bath, milk, books, bed. (didn't work)
Earlier nap during the day. (didn't work)
No nap (doesn't work and makes everyone miserable)
Going to bed earlier. (I think 7:00 p.m. is early enough)

Staying in bed all night is the other issue. He will sleep for about two hours and then he gets up. He is then up religiously every two hours or less all night long. I get up at night with landon more than I do with Alexa. As a matter of fact, she has slept through the night since she was six months old. It's not as though he is scared. He's not frightened in anyway. He does have his nights where he does have a bad dream, but rarely does that happen.
I refuse to let him sleep with us or on our floor, unless he is sick. We have our bed and he has his and that's just the way it's going to be in our family. I am not going to be lazy and give in because rules are rules. We have a night light in his room. We have tried leaving his door open. We have tried leaving his door closed. We let him sleep on the air mattress on his floor. We have let him sleep on his floor.
I also refuse to give him milk in bed, knowing that when he was younger it worked, but he is three years old and doesn't need to eat like a baby in the middle of the night. He also doesn't need milk to go to sleep at night, again because he is not a baby.
Staying in bed at night has become such a problem with Landon, I don't know what else to do. Let him cry it out and fall asleep you say? Not in our family, letting Landon cry it out results in him BARFING!!! Sorry, but it's the truth. Then we spend a half hour cleaning a big mess up. I am frustrated, chris is REALLY frustrated and Landon is getting his way by not having to go to bed as he watches us clean up his mess. Let him clean it up you say? Really, would you let your three year old clean up his own throw-up? I bet not and I'm not going to either. Reward system you say? Yeah right. Not with my kid. We have made charts, he has been promised treats or prizes...this is what he does.
I found a picture of Landon on some monkey bars. I cut out the entire image of him on the bars and then drew on a posterboard some monkey bars. The thought was to move the image of landon down the monkey bars and when he gets to the end, he earns a prize. He, by himself, came up with getting to ride in his Papaw's Camero to Chuckie Cheese. Great! He helped me with the poster, we took it to his room, and went over what it meant and if he stayed in his bed for seven days (the number of monkey bars), he would get the reward.
An hour passes and this is what Landon tells me with a very smart alec tone:
Landon: "mommy, i dont' want to ride in papaw's camero to chuckie cheese. i don't want to go to chuckie cheese (in other words, "i could care less about a reward, so that means i don't have to stay in my bed)"
Me: well....I have nothing to say because I am SO frustrated.

I don't know if I should take something away from him since he doesn't care if he gets a reward or not. I have thought of taking his blankie away and telling him he can earn it back if he stays in bed Not to mention, at three in the morning, he could care less about fancy cars or fun games with a creepy mouse walking around trying to give high fives!!!!!! I can't say I haven't layed down with him in the middle of the night and accidentally fallen asleep....But I really don't want to create a monster by my sleeping with him.

I love Landon dearly and want to help him find his independence and I know he is capable of many things, including sleeping in his own bed, in his own room. I pray there is never a day that I don't have the opportunity to snuggle with him and for him to "need" me. But, we both need our sleep.

I guess I am posting this to see if anyone has any advice on what to do. Even if I don't know you and you read my blog... I up for anything! Landon is so tired and frustrated and grumpy. After not much sleep at night...he also is an early riser, always has been and putting him to bed later doesn't mean he sleeps later. I've done it all, and I have no more options left. A gate at his door would do no good, because he could probably walk right over it. Nothing phases him as far as rewards go and I feel like I am failing. I am exhausted and frustrated and need HELP!!!!!
Thanks for reading this long blog....if you did read it all...there is a reward of a ride in a camero to chuckie cheese that my three year old could care less about...it's totally up for grabs!

Gosh...he's so cute.


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Comments

Hi jennifer, it's Mauria Beck/Smith, from Ben Davis. I was reading your blog and looked up in my "What to expect, the toddler years" book and here's what they say. I fortunately, don't have to deal with Harrison getting out of bed at night, but I'm so afraid of what I'm going to do when he's actually in a bed, and not a crib. :) Here ya go:
1. Explain that sleep is necessary for healthy growth in order to be able to run around and have fun. Remind him of people who sleep at night (friends, cousins, grandparents, etc)
2. Consider a later bedtime. If he takes an hour or more to fall asleep try pushing his bedtime.
3. Don't insist on your toddlers going to sleep immediately if he says he isn't tired. Allow him to listen to tapes, look at books, etc.
4. When he comes and gets you in the middle of the night make communication with you be so uncompelling that he won't feel it's worth eliciting. Make every statement monotone and repeat the same answer over and over.
5. Don't lose it. the more imperturbable you stay in the face of repeated trips to your toddlers room the fewer trips you'll ultimately end up making.

I hope this helps, and good luck!
Kelly Kruse said…
???Call Supernanny????

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